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Stupid squirrel...can't you make the 'R' sound?

"Now time to test my Wino formula!" the squirrel sqeaks excitedly. You've hit your head quite hard on the path, so you are in no mood to think about how this squirrel can talk. Suddenly the squirrel is standing on your chest looking down at you. He sprinkles your face with a strange dust, and for some reason you yawn. As you open your mouth the squirrel pours a gloppy orange liquid down your throat.

"You shall soon be a wino!" the squirrel pipes excitedly.

Suddenly you are jerked awake by a strange, undescribable feeling. Suddenly you see checkerboards and you feel your body morphing. Into a "wino" you think. What's a wino?

"Muahahaha!" the squirrel laughs. It sounds ridiculous with that high voice of his. "The wino is complete!"

You try to scream at him, "WHAT'S A WINO AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME!" but you can't seem to move your lips...and the sound that comes out isn't human. Suddenly your vision clears of the checkerboards and you see two horns on your now elongated snout. You realize that the squirrel can't make an "r" sound so he must use "w". You are a rhinoceros.

Written by an anonymous author (edited by wanderer)

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