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Maybe some moderation would have been good.

Among the ships many amenities is the all you can eat buffet, open 24/7, constantly being restocked, not to mention the special themed event buffets like the chocolate buffet, pastry buffet, donut buffet, cake buffet, etc. And you spend... more then your fair share of time indulging yourself. After all, got to keep this new body of yours fueled right?

Your near constant presence prompts the staff to arrange a spot for you, a corner booth with the table attached on a hinge joint, reserved just for you, where your... ample features can be properly accommodated. At the beginning of the cruise, you take up a good half of the booth, but each day you return, the booth seems to get more... crowded, and the table digs more and more into your stomach. Thank goodness for all that muscle...

Except your 'vacation' seems to be more exhausting then you realize. For some strange reason, you find yourself taking more naps, feeling weighed down, and having more difficulty carrying yourself. When the boat finally pulls into harbor, you at seated in the booth, huffing after finishing your 18th trip to the desert table as you hear the whistle for dismemberment sound.

You groan, pushing the table aside. By now your rump is wedged into the both, filling the whole row with each side hidden beneath each cheek. Of course that is further hidden by the massive love handles your arms rest on. You slide forward, wobbling as you adjust your weight which settles on massive legs as you waddle slowly, squeezing through the doors to the outside as the staff pushes from behind as the boat wobbles as you move about. As you head towards the gang plank, you are stopped by the tiger.

"Ok, so you beat me," he says, "But, despite that, I really think you need to do something about your health habits."

"Seriously," you pant, "You lost get over it," you say, edging yourself around the tiger, which is difficult since you take up the entire walkway by now.

"Yeah, but at the rate your are gaining... mwmph!" he says but is stopped as your stomach squishes him into the wall of the ship. You continue forward waiting to hear him again as you move, but it's not until the walkway widens that you suddenly hear a gasp of air as the tiger falls back, having bee dragged with you. You leave him there as you head to the gang plank, only to be stopped by the staff.

"What now," you say, tired of being delayed. "Sorry sir," says the staff, "But your weight exceeds safety regulation for the gangplank, we have arranged a... safer disembarkment procedure for guests of your.... magnitude?" he says, not sure what the polite terminology for 'big as a whale' is. You hear machinery, and see the wench for the ship lower down, a platform with a safety net attached which the staff motions you into.

You sit down on it, feeling your rump exceed the sides of the platform. Then you feet the net rise, pulling at your sides. There is the sound of cracking wood as the net begins to lift, then the sound of straining gears. The net shudders as you are pulled up slowly, and you can hear the wench squealing.

Maybe you did overdo it, you think, as you are slowly swung off the ship. You see people on the dock looking up and pointing. "What is that?" you hear from some of those watching, "A whale? Isn't that illegal?" "No, it's covered in fur, probably a pile of imported fur coats." "But it's moving, and it's one color!" "Is it a new whale species?"

Your cheeks flush red as you hear all this, suddenly away of how much weight you managed to pack on during your cruise. The wench begins lowering you, and you can hear the gears screaming as they attempt to lower you slowly. about 5 feet from the ground, you hear a metallic clang, and suddenly the cable goes slack, and you hear grinding gears as smoke explodes from the machine and you are dropped onto the ground, the wooden platform splintering into a million pieces as your weight comes down on it. You are unharmed, more then enough padding, though the impact has you on your back, your titanic stomach wobbling.

The crowd closes in to see what you are. "What... is it?" " wait, it that a wolf?" "No, it can't be, it's got to be a bear at the very least." "No bears grow that big, it's got to be a mommoth." "Mammoths don't have claws you idiot!" "You feel someone climb on top of you, prodding you with a stick." "It's fat as hell," you hear the voice say, "Maybe some mutated polar bear that mated with a walrus?"

"GET OFF ME." you yell, struggling to get up, heaving your weight. Even with your muscle, just moving yourself up from that position is difficult, as those muscles can't find purchase, like being swaddled in a jello blanket. You hear the crowd gasp and the person on top of you tumbles off as your form quivers and shakes as you heave yourself over, rolling onto your stomach before getting to your feet. The crowd runs in terror as your weight settles, and you take a step onto the pavement, and hear a crackle as the cobblestone cracks beneath your weight. "It's a... fat yeti!" you hear as the last person disappears. You grumble, taking a good look at yourself, and realizing your cheeks now dominate your head. Whatever semblance of a neck you had is gone, your jowls merging into the flab surrounding it. Your body is more round then anything, and definitely bigger horizontally then you are vertical. You can't reach around your chest anymore, having to push it down if you want to reach your face or other arm, and you can barely reach halfway down your stomach. Well, you don't have time to dwell on that, you need to get to the castle so you can get back to normal.

You begin walking, feeling the cobblestone crack with each step. Seeing the castle up on the highest hill, you groan, finally conceding that the tiger may have had a point, as you waddle your way forward.

Written by an anonymous author

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